Adversity is one of my Top 365. Adversity makes us tough. Adversity builds character and strength and teaches us to trust.
Adversity can hold one back from pursuing new interests but it can also be our best friend. Learning from failure can make one stronger and more focused on God and our life mission. When facing failure in relationships, work, or in personal goals, one has three choices.
1. Let the failure consume you and never try again.
2. Learn from your mistakes, acknowledge the set back and move on to a better situation.
3. Run.
While running or holding back are the less painful ways to deal, they also are the less productive. We tell kids all of the time,
"Get right back out there and try again"
" Don't be defined by your mistakes. Practice, regroup, and try again"
" You are not what you do. You are who you are"
" Everything happens for a reason"
As an adult, failure and mistakes are a bit harder to take. What will the person in the next relationship or job think of me? How will I overcome? What if I never achieve again? Can I persevere? And the answer is positive to all of these. God does not make a mountain for us to climb that we cannot climb. We learn from our failures and we process them and then we move on. What was meant to be will be and although the memories may be embarrassing or painful, they are a part of life. A paragraph of clichés there but they are real.
So how to handle?
1. Check your emotional intelligence and relationship skills.
2. Check your level of fitness.
3. Check your goals and redefine if necessary.
4. Believe that good comes to all who persevere.
5. Find the message in the failure and let it be your guide.
6. Find your creative outlet.
Failure in the area of our life we focus on the most ignites a need for balance. We need to look for a balance of work/life relationships and look to help others without berating ourselves. Life is so short. There is always an answer and it lies in a good attitude, a good heart, and the ability to see reality. We can have no more.
Looking back we can see the big picture. While in the midst, it is not so easy. Trust.
Boyfriends and girlfriends come and go. Family members and spouses are precious and we often lose them too soon. You are only one step away at any time from the unemployment line. Nothing lasts forever. There is no guarantee of good health. A failure in one area does not signify a failure in life but usually a failure in a life decision. No time for guilt, and the failure does not define you. No negativity intended here, but reality. We cannot sit around and fear adversity but must know that it will come and usually hit us in our strongest area. Good relationships, faith, and a good heart will help you meet it when the time comes.
Pick up and move on, don't get stuck, find the lesson, and keep a kind spirit. Turn adversity into a message. Turn bitterness into advocacy. Forgive. Keep your esteem high and your thoughts close. Better days are coming but today is only here now. Take advantage.
Don't let a dormant and angry personality become your stronghold. Grieve it and move on. Know that God works in ways that are best and we don't always know the message. Believe.
Thursday, May 22, 2014
Sunday, May 18, 2014
Celebrate Your Own Top 365
Birthdays are fun days. Last night we celebrated my niece Sarah's birthday. I loved seeing her celebrate her birthday this week because I love her so much.
Lunch out on her day, Disneyland today. Family dinner last night. Cards. Flowers, Her cakes. All but one of her cousins were there. Both grandmas. Two aunts. Her best friend. Love was in the air.
Lunch out on her day, Disneyland today. Family dinner last night. Cards. Flowers, Her cakes. All but one of her cousins were there. Both grandmas. Two aunts. Her best friend. Love was in the air.
It is good to take time out to celebrate.
Take Some Time for Some Mini Rebellion
Use the pronoun you instead of I
Sleep an extra five minutes.
Buy a new shirt or book just because you can.
Go to Disneyland. (In spite of the fact that they raised the price today).
Take a nap.
Watch an old movie.
Go to see the Cardinals play three times this year.
Hike to the top
Dance in the kitchen.
Drive to your favorite spot.
Go out to lunch
See a movie
Drink a martini
This may seem like a corny post but it is true. If you don't take the time, time will take over. The benefits of self discipline are numerous and necessary for success in life and sometimes the best way to enjoy is to appreciate. Self discipline is often best served with a little down time.
Our family has lost a lot of people in the past ten years. An aunt, two uncles, a grandma, three cousins. It's never too early to start to celebrate your own Top 365 and to make yourself one of the top of the list.
Monday, May 12, 2014
Rohlfing's Bridge
Ok. Raise your hand if you have ever been to Rohlfing's bridge.
Rohlfings' Bridge is a Bridge in Illinois which bears our name but never belonged to us. Nonetheless, it is a staple in our days of growing up in Vandalia and one of my Top 365 memories inspired by my friend Pat Billingsley who I so fondly remember one evening at the bridge. I have a few memories of the bridge.
We used to have high school parties on the bridge. It was located down the road from our house in the country and thus named after us. My Mom reminded us frequently that that was not our bridge. She did not want our name associated with that social spot.
One memory I have of the Bridge is of the boulder that sat on the right side of the road right before the bridge. It was there that my friend Pat was barreling, and I mean barreling, down the road in her Fury and stopped suddenly. We hit the boulder full force before stopping before the bridge. We were in no way hurt, but boy did we have h..... to pay the next day explaining to Mr. Fitzgerald how that large cut got into the side of his car. As I recall we did not worry much about it that night because our philosophy was always to worry about it tomorrow.
Another memory of the Bridge relates to one of our high school teachers, Mr. Heinzmann heard Nev and I talking about going to a party at the Bridge that week end. We all congregated that night and who showed up, but Mr. Heinzmann on his Harley. You can imagine the looks of surprise of all of we high school students seeing our English teacher show up, but we made him feel welcome and were delighted to have him.
One of my other favorite memories of Rohlfing's bridge was when I was a senior in high school. We were down having a party on the Bridge and suddenly my Mom showed up in her house coat duster. It was a Friday night and our Aunt Rose had heard over the police scanner that there was a party at Rohlfing's bridge. My Mom came down and dragged me home so I would not get in trouble. She still was not happy that the Bridge was named after us. What she did not know was that my brother, always the sly one, was also at the party and under the Bridge. Being the good sister I am, I did not snitch him out.
Growing up in a small town has its perks. You grow up with great friends and build relationships that last on memories forever. Road parties are a part of it. We never hurt anyone and fortunately no one ever was hurt. I am not sure if kids still have parties at that Bridge or if they still call it Rohlfing's Bridge because we are long gone. What I do know is that at every get together where we have high school friends, those memories of the Bridge come up.
Rohlfings' Bridge is a Bridge in Illinois which bears our name but never belonged to us. Nonetheless, it is a staple in our days of growing up in Vandalia and one of my Top 365 memories inspired by my friend Pat Billingsley who I so fondly remember one evening at the bridge. I have a few memories of the bridge.
We used to have high school parties on the bridge. It was located down the road from our house in the country and thus named after us. My Mom reminded us frequently that that was not our bridge. She did not want our name associated with that social spot.
One memory I have of the Bridge is of the boulder that sat on the right side of the road right before the bridge. It was there that my friend Pat was barreling, and I mean barreling, down the road in her Fury and stopped suddenly. We hit the boulder full force before stopping before the bridge. We were in no way hurt, but boy did we have h..... to pay the next day explaining to Mr. Fitzgerald how that large cut got into the side of his car. As I recall we did not worry much about it that night because our philosophy was always to worry about it tomorrow.
Another memory of the Bridge relates to one of our high school teachers, Mr. Heinzmann heard Nev and I talking about going to a party at the Bridge that week end. We all congregated that night and who showed up, but Mr. Heinzmann on his Harley. You can imagine the looks of surprise of all of we high school students seeing our English teacher show up, but we made him feel welcome and were delighted to have him.
One of my other favorite memories of Rohlfing's bridge was when I was a senior in high school. We were down having a party on the Bridge and suddenly my Mom showed up in her house coat duster. It was a Friday night and our Aunt Rose had heard over the police scanner that there was a party at Rohlfing's bridge. My Mom came down and dragged me home so I would not get in trouble. She still was not happy that the Bridge was named after us. What she did not know was that my brother, always the sly one, was also at the party and under the Bridge. Being the good sister I am, I did not snitch him out.
Growing up in a small town has its perks. You grow up with great friends and build relationships that last on memories forever. Road parties are a part of it. We never hurt anyone and fortunately no one ever was hurt. I am not sure if kids still have parties at that Bridge or if they still call it Rohlfing's Bridge because we are long gone. What I do know is that at every get together where we have high school friends, those memories of the Bridge come up.
Saturday, May 10, 2014
My Cousin Susan
My Cousin Susan is one of my Top 365's.
Susan lives in Central California and is the mom to three grown kids. She is a great mom!. She has always been kind and caring and takes great care of her kids. I love her matter of fact attitude about things and her laugh. She has a great sense of humor and I think I respect her the most because she does not get caught up in trying to prove herself and is not judgmental but accepting. . That confidence is contagious when you are around her.
Susan is a teacher and a good one. I remember when she got her credential and how hard she worked to make things work for her kids. She also spent a period of time bouncing between two schools as administrator and at the same time she was raising her daughter. Her kids are great. I remember how much fun we had with her boys when they were younger. And her daughter is now an adult but I remember when she was younger and we would go out to eat when I would visit and she was always so sweet. Good golfer too. I
I remember years ago when we were both single and we went out a couple of times. When my brother was married, Susan came to the wedding. I took her out with my crazy friends and we had quite a time. The guys in Vandalia were quite taken with her. One night we took over at Ship Captain Crew when she was visiting Vandalia. I like to be around Susan because she makes everyone around her feel good.
Susan is pretty and I have seen her more than once step up to the plate to take care of family members when she was needed. I think I respect her so much because she just rolls with things. She does not get caught up in second guessing and just accepts what is there for what is there. I saw this when my Aunt Dorothy passed away. Although it was very sudden, Susan took over and made sure all was together for the funeral. I saw her strength there in a time that was so unpredicted and painful.
Susan likes to go to the casino. One time when she and Aunt Dorothy were visiting me, we went to the boats in St. Louis, I won big fast. (once in a lifetime for me). They were laughing at me because after I won, I put my money up and went to the lobby and read a book. We also had fun shopping and going out to eat and one time I thought I would miss my plane because we stopped at every mall from Ventura to LA looking for some shoes for Aunt Dorothy. I
I have so much respect for Susan. Her kindness and her ability to make everyone around her feel good. I am glad to know that she is one of my Top 365.
Susan lives in Central California and is the mom to three grown kids. She is a great mom!. She has always been kind and caring and takes great care of her kids. I love her matter of fact attitude about things and her laugh. She has a great sense of humor and I think I respect her the most because she does not get caught up in trying to prove herself and is not judgmental but accepting. . That confidence is contagious when you are around her.
Susan is a teacher and a good one. I remember when she got her credential and how hard she worked to make things work for her kids. She also spent a period of time bouncing between two schools as administrator and at the same time she was raising her daughter. Her kids are great. I remember how much fun we had with her boys when they were younger. And her daughter is now an adult but I remember when she was younger and we would go out to eat when I would visit and she was always so sweet. Good golfer too. I
I remember years ago when we were both single and we went out a couple of times. When my brother was married, Susan came to the wedding. I took her out with my crazy friends and we had quite a time. The guys in Vandalia were quite taken with her. One night we took over at Ship Captain Crew when she was visiting Vandalia. I like to be around Susan because she makes everyone around her feel good.
Susan is pretty and I have seen her more than once step up to the plate to take care of family members when she was needed. I think I respect her so much because she just rolls with things. She does not get caught up in second guessing and just accepts what is there for what is there. I saw this when my Aunt Dorothy passed away. Although it was very sudden, Susan took over and made sure all was together for the funeral. I saw her strength there in a time that was so unpredicted and painful.
Susan likes to go to the casino. One time when she and Aunt Dorothy were visiting me, we went to the boats in St. Louis, I won big fast. (once in a lifetime for me). They were laughing at me because after I won, I put my money up and went to the lobby and read a book. We also had fun shopping and going out to eat and one time I thought I would miss my plane because we stopped at every mall from Ventura to LA looking for some shoes for Aunt Dorothy. I
I have so much respect for Susan. Her kindness and her ability to make everyone around her feel good. I am glad to know that she is one of my Top 365.
Wednesday, May 7, 2014
The Wizard of Oz Brownstown High School 1990
One of my Top 365 memories goes to the cast and crew of The Wizard of Oz, Brownstown High school 1990. Upon reflection, what a labor of love.
I came into the role of play director at Brownstown as a part of my "extra curricular duties". I approached the role of play director as an opportunity to work with students to bring about an extravaganza. And that it was.........
With Dave as the Scarecrow and Tina as the Tin Man and Kelley as the Lion, they went down the Yellow Brick Road. I am not going to cite all cast members for fear of forgetting some. Michele as the Good Witch. And who can forget Sherry as the Wicked Witch of the West and Kathy as Dorothy. We had witches brew and we had Flying Monkies. We used music from the Wizard of Oz and music from Cats. . We had the Munchkins and we had Kansas and Oz. And who to forget Jon as our Wizard,, "Oz the Great and Powerful".
We worked hard and synched the songs and dances. Parents made costumes. We did newspaper articles and radio shows and we had SO MUCH FUN. Directing plays was always a challenge at Brownstown because we were small. We had to compete with a lot of other activities and for gym space.
Nonetheless, the show did go on. TWICE. The Board asked us to do an encore performance because some of them missed the first one and heard it was good. We danced, we sang and I hope that for some of the cast members it was a chance to grow into stronger and more confident people.
As I look on those times, it was all about creating experiences for kids that would make them happy and more confident people. It was about making music and having fun and working together. Many of my Facebook friends who were students were parts of the other plays which I will probably discuss at a different time. Someday I am going to have all of those videos put onto DVD.
The lesson to be learned was: Anything is possible and go for your dreams.
I watch Glee every week. Now they have moved on to New York but the esteem and the joy of singing and acting and producing is so relevant today. I am all for a balance in education and I think the Common Core can only bring back some of the focus on creativity and collaboration which I think is good if done right. But Sometimes I get stuck on these times at Brownstown. We had it so good. Probably if I had kids of my own I would be reflecting on their plays and activities. Yet, I like to think that as teachers we made a difference. Today is Teacher Appreciation Day. I don't need a day of appreciation. It should be coined, Student Appreciation Day. So to the cast and crew of The Wizard of Oz, 1990, the experience was one in a lifetime and for those I keep in touch with, you have moved on to be adults to be proud of as I see it in your posts and pictures.
Lea Michelle is starring as Dorothy in the remake of Oz to be released this Friday. Bet it won't be as good as ours. Huh Kathy? With Love. Ms R.
I came into the role of play director at Brownstown as a part of my "extra curricular duties". I approached the role of play director as an opportunity to work with students to bring about an extravaganza. And that it was.........
With Dave as the Scarecrow and Tina as the Tin Man and Kelley as the Lion, they went down the Yellow Brick Road. I am not going to cite all cast members for fear of forgetting some. Michele as the Good Witch. And who can forget Sherry as the Wicked Witch of the West and Kathy as Dorothy. We had witches brew and we had Flying Monkies. We used music from the Wizard of Oz and music from Cats. . We had the Munchkins and we had Kansas and Oz. And who to forget Jon as our Wizard,, "Oz the Great and Powerful".
We worked hard and synched the songs and dances. Parents made costumes. We did newspaper articles and radio shows and we had SO MUCH FUN. Directing plays was always a challenge at Brownstown because we were small. We had to compete with a lot of other activities and for gym space.
Nonetheless, the show did go on. TWICE. The Board asked us to do an encore performance because some of them missed the first one and heard it was good. We danced, we sang and I hope that for some of the cast members it was a chance to grow into stronger and more confident people.
As I look on those times, it was all about creating experiences for kids that would make them happy and more confident people. It was about making music and having fun and working together. Many of my Facebook friends who were students were parts of the other plays which I will probably discuss at a different time. Someday I am going to have all of those videos put onto DVD.
The lesson to be learned was: Anything is possible and go for your dreams.
I watch Glee every week. Now they have moved on to New York but the esteem and the joy of singing and acting and producing is so relevant today. I am all for a balance in education and I think the Common Core can only bring back some of the focus on creativity and collaboration which I think is good if done right. But Sometimes I get stuck on these times at Brownstown. We had it so good. Probably if I had kids of my own I would be reflecting on their plays and activities. Yet, I like to think that as teachers we made a difference. Today is Teacher Appreciation Day. I don't need a day of appreciation. It should be coined, Student Appreciation Day. So to the cast and crew of The Wizard of Oz, 1990, the experience was one in a lifetime and for those I keep in touch with, you have moved on to be adults to be proud of as I see it in your posts and pictures.
Lea Michelle is starring as Dorothy in the remake of Oz to be released this Friday. Bet it won't be as good as ours. Huh Kathy? With Love. Ms R.
Sunday, May 4, 2014
Holy Cross Lutheran Church
Well how can a church be one of my Top 365? Holy Cross Lutheran Church in Vandalia, IL definitely had an influence on me and still does today. From the time I can remember we went to church every Sunday. Some Sundays my Dad would drive out to pick us up from staying all night at Grandma's, but we never missed church.
The church was a big part of our growing up. Our family friends were from the church and attended. The Thomans. The Beckmans. The Meyers. The Woolseys. My Dad sang in the choir and taught Sunday School. We were baptized there and attended Confirmation classes everrrrrrryyyyy Wednesday for four years until we were confirmed. :)
I go to church now and just as back then, the liturgy comes back to me. The communion liturgy, the benediction. The closing hymn. Such good and warm feelings that provoked. As a child knowing it was almost over and we could go home. As an adult knowing how much it is a part of who I am and what I believe to be real in life.
I remember Trick or Treating for Unicef and when we moved from the old church into the new one. There were two services and we attended the 10:30 service and Sunday School. On Sundays we would go to breakfast with my Dad and eat at Robbin's and see my Grandma. Then to church.
My Dad was an usher too. Everyone had their regular seats where they sat each Sunday. Christmas Eve services were always really special too and such a big part of the holiday. It was never are we going to church? Church was just a part of our lives.
Holy Cross Lutheran Church and my Dad will always be a tied in memory. We lost him so young and the church is what for me keeps him alive in my heart.
Nothing was perfect though. I can remember one time when my friend Jerri and I were sitting in front together and talking and the preacher stopped the sermon to shut us down. I love the old red hymnal. Grandma used to tell me she did not like to go to the Lutheran church because we had to stand up and sit down so much.
Recently my nephew, Jared was baptized in the Catholic Church. During the service I was sitting with my niece Sarah and we were talking. Suddenly my mom gently poked me to shut me up. I felt like I was nine years old again. Yep. Some things never change.
But the love, the faith, the tradition, and the feeling embedded in Holy Cross Lutheran Church will withstand forever. As will the people.
"And may the peace of God which passes all human understanding keep your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus". (Know that one by heart).
The church was a big part of our growing up. Our family friends were from the church and attended. The Thomans. The Beckmans. The Meyers. The Woolseys. My Dad sang in the choir and taught Sunday School. We were baptized there and attended Confirmation classes everrrrrrryyyyy Wednesday for four years until we were confirmed. :)
I go to church now and just as back then, the liturgy comes back to me. The communion liturgy, the benediction. The closing hymn. Such good and warm feelings that provoked. As a child knowing it was almost over and we could go home. As an adult knowing how much it is a part of who I am and what I believe to be real in life.
I remember Trick or Treating for Unicef and when we moved from the old church into the new one. There were two services and we attended the 10:30 service and Sunday School. On Sundays we would go to breakfast with my Dad and eat at Robbin's and see my Grandma. Then to church.
My Dad was an usher too. Everyone had their regular seats where they sat each Sunday. Christmas Eve services were always really special too and such a big part of the holiday. It was never are we going to church? Church was just a part of our lives.
Holy Cross Lutheran Church and my Dad will always be a tied in memory. We lost him so young and the church is what for me keeps him alive in my heart.
Nothing was perfect though. I can remember one time when my friend Jerri and I were sitting in front together and talking and the preacher stopped the sermon to shut us down. I love the old red hymnal. Grandma used to tell me she did not like to go to the Lutheran church because we had to stand up and sit down so much.
Recently my nephew, Jared was baptized in the Catholic Church. During the service I was sitting with my niece Sarah and we were talking. Suddenly my mom gently poked me to shut me up. I felt like I was nine years old again. Yep. Some things never change.
But the love, the faith, the tradition, and the feeling embedded in Holy Cross Lutheran Church will withstand forever. As will the people.
"And may the peace of God which passes all human understanding keep your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus". (Know that one by heart).
Saturday, May 3, 2014
Ruth
I can only name this post, Ruth, because she would not be happy with me if I added her last name. I inherited my friendship with Ruth via marriage. Ruth is one of the most genuine people I know. She is a grandma and now a great grandma. I see her from one side, the side of her being grandma to my niece and nephew. Her other members of the family see her from a lot of other places.
I think Ruth is wonderful and she has been an influence on my life. She is kind. She stands behind her family members, and she is funny. Being around her family has enabled me to see a family that sticks together and has fun together through family tradition and love. She has great faith and a great sense of humor. Ruth gives me the coolest gifts. Like a Yahtzee game and a roll of quarters to play. Or stamps and envelopes. She just thinks of the little things that are so important.
I felt really privileged that Ruth was a part of one of the best days of my life when I defended my dissertation. She made me feel so accomplished and I appreciated her being there so much. I think I love her so much because she loves our family so much,,, especially my niece and nephew.
Recently we all went to church to hear their family friend preach. This is an example of Ruth. The preacher brought his young daughter. It was chilly outside from the beach breeze and she was visibly cold. Ruth noticed and gave her her sweater to wear. That is Ruth. She always notices when other people need something. Then she quietly fixes it with no attention to herself.
Ruth is a mom at heart. She has a quick sense of humor and she represents all a mom is from raising kids in the 1950's and 1960's. . Always there and loving her kids. Sometimes she sends me a card with 5.00 in it just because. She makes funny jokes and reflects on situations. I also love Ruth because she is my Mom's best friend and is there for her when she needs something.
A word to describe Ruth.... barracuda. Barracuda when she needs to defend her own or stand by those she loves. She is silent but strong in her convictions.
Do not tell Ruth I wrote about her because she is humble.. and does not like attention.. and will not be happy with me when she finds out I wrote this. But I don't care.... I love her..her sense of humor... and her quick wit and family loyalty and I am so glad to put her in my Top 365.
I think Ruth is wonderful and she has been an influence on my life. She is kind. She stands behind her family members, and she is funny. Being around her family has enabled me to see a family that sticks together and has fun together through family tradition and love. She has great faith and a great sense of humor. Ruth gives me the coolest gifts. Like a Yahtzee game and a roll of quarters to play. Or stamps and envelopes. She just thinks of the little things that are so important.
I felt really privileged that Ruth was a part of one of the best days of my life when I defended my dissertation. She made me feel so accomplished and I appreciated her being there so much. I think I love her so much because she loves our family so much,,, especially my niece and nephew.
Recently we all went to church to hear their family friend preach. This is an example of Ruth. The preacher brought his young daughter. It was chilly outside from the beach breeze and she was visibly cold. Ruth noticed and gave her her sweater to wear. That is Ruth. She always notices when other people need something. Then she quietly fixes it with no attention to herself.
Ruth is a mom at heart. She has a quick sense of humor and she represents all a mom is from raising kids in the 1950's and 1960's. . Always there and loving her kids. Sometimes she sends me a card with 5.00 in it just because. She makes funny jokes and reflects on situations. I also love Ruth because she is my Mom's best friend and is there for her when she needs something.
A word to describe Ruth.... barracuda. Barracuda when she needs to defend her own or stand by those she loves. She is silent but strong in her convictions.
Do not tell Ruth I wrote about her because she is humble.. and does not like attention.. and will not be happy with me when she finds out I wrote this. But I don't care.... I love her..her sense of humor... and her quick wit and family loyalty and I am so glad to put her in my Top 365.
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