Stay Out of the Line of Fire

The line of fire comes when unhappiness hits a person and they lash out. The line of fire comes with a fierce ray of lightening. It can come in the form of abusive words, exclusive acts, or lies and deceit. The said thing about the line of fire is the fact that it has no logic behind it other than unhappiness and a desire to hurt another to ease one's pain.

When You are In the Line of Fire
When you are in the line of fire you will find yourself feeling quite like a rag doll. Pulled and pushed and yanked from place to place, being in the line of fire means that for the moment, one no longer has any control of one's fate or behavior. Instead, one is at the beck and call of the abuser. One must march when told to march and stop when told to stop. One must take the brunt of all of the pent up anger and aggression of the unhappy perpetrator. One is not a victim, yet plays a role in keeping the perp happy. If the perp can push around someone, he or she avoids personal pain. Becomes the aggressor. Gains power.

What Does the Line of Fire Entail?
1. Manipulation
2. Anger
3. Unfair threats
4. Exclusion
5. Chaos
6. Mixed messages
7. Control
8. Giddiness
9. Mobbing
10. Lies

How Does One Function While in the Line of Fire?
1. Focus on the positive.
2. A foundation solid and values oriented.
3. Hanging with happy people
4. Ignoring as long as possible
5. Confronting publicly
6. Staying Strong
7. Creating cartoon characters of the perp
8. Keeping one's values and integrity in place
9. Not giving in to the goading.
10. Finding a silver lining.

The humane way to deal with being in the line of fire is to have empathy for the pain of the perp. This though can only go so far. The level of tolerance depends on one's pain tolerance. When the chips are down and the pressure becomes intense, one needs an out. An escape. A place to run to to feel safe. This can be a physical place or a mental place. It is at this point that one must accept one's humanness. And begin self nurturing. Detachment. Righteous indignation. Mind games. It is at this point that one can say, "Enough is enough". I have had my fill of your junk and I am not going to play anymore. You can try to turn the tables on me and I will persevere because i am strong and I have no horse in this race. You have put me in your line of fire due to your own insecurity and toxic needs. I am not to blame and I will now exit. I may physically be present, but I have mentally checked out. And I am not playing anymore.

Lines of fire happen at all levels and places. The manipulator, the bully, the person looking to play with a new toy, the uninhibited. Yet, we know, pride comes before a downfall and we create the karma we keep. Throwing other people under the bus can only last for a while. Then the truth comes back to kick one's behind.  In the meantime, we hear of people who are the target of abusers for years who have no way to escape yet they survive.

Being in the line of fire, however painful and dysfunctional, does make one stronger. It is finding the inner strength to move forward within the situation that builds the ability to keep persevering.